Of the many emails that I get every day, some are more important than others.
One such email came today in the form of a daily devotional. It used Matthew 18:15-16 as its inspiration: “If another member of the church sins against you, go and point out the fault when two of you are alone. If the member listens to you, you have regained that one. But if you are not listened to, take one or two others along with you, so that every word may be confirmed by the evidence of two or three witnesses”.
The author goes on to talk about how we (Clergy) are trained in Family Systems Theory , which teaches that conflicts don’t get resolved when we don’t address them directly.
Indirect communication maintains the status quo. It goes on to say that “Real change can only happen when we go straight to the source”.
Jesus Cares
Jesus cares so much about the people and wants them to live in health and wellness. He doesn’t want disputes to pull them apart! He wants them together. He wants them well. He cares about what Christian community looks like be it at home, church, everywhere.
Sometimes it’s not only a dispute that creates the issue.
Recently I mentioned in my Pastor’s report that I would like the council to read a book called Part Time is Plenty. I didn’t give any other information. A month later I mentioned it again in my report and didn’t say any more; I just sat back and waited for the conversation to start. Needless to say, the conversation didn’t start. There has been no mention of it by anyone. It has occurred to me that I have not done a very good job of communicating what I hoped to accomplish. I have learned something from this, we can’t just throw the idea out there and “hope” that everyone understands our unspoken word!
So, this month I will again mention the idea, but this time it will come with a reason, a plan, and a desired outcome. I am lucky that I have the opportunity to at least try and correct this one, this time. I believe that’s what Matthew was referring to when he said “go and point out the fault when the two of you are alone”. If it does not work out, don’t give up, keep trying. The issue won’t get better if we allow our ego to get in the way.
Sometimes we need to take a step back and take responsibility for our own actions and just perhaps cut the other party some slack!
Blessings to you all.
Your servant in Christ,
Pastor Kerry